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14 March 2007

Just Another Day in L.A.

Now that we have an extra hour of daylight, you have the chance to see some things that you normally wouldn’t...or shouldn’t.

Driving home the other night, I witnessed a huge, white van suddenly cut over from lane two to lane one of a major boulevard, nearly clipping the blue Bronco rightfully driving in that space. Rubber was laid as the Bronco’s brakes were applied. The van driver seemed oblivious, if not impaired. One would think such an abrupt lane change would be due to the need of an upcoming left turn. Nope. This was just a willy-nilly whim. The Bronco driver (a chick) was having none of it. Surely her insurance rates had flashed before her eyes. The Bronco betty pulled next to the van (also driven by a chick) and gave that white trash a piece of her mind before gunning it when the light changed and cutting off the van (and justifiably so). In response, the van driver (who had several leafy plants and a few dogs bopping about the interior), stuck her head out of the window and howled -- yes, howled -- at the Bronco.

Now I was driving behind the white van, and was less than happy. The van drove well below the speed limit and had yet to make a left turn (which would have justified her daft lane change). I finally had enough and zipped around her. At the next light, I watched the white van driver from my rearview mirror as she made out with her dog. Yes. Made out. With. Her. Dog. She had leaned over, wrapped her arm around the dog and began kissing it. I turned around to be sure of what I was seeing. Then, I threw up a little in my mouth at the sight. As I pulled away with the relief of the green light, she remained nuzzled with her canine companion, screwing up traffic. Lord only knows what she might be screwing later.

In other news more fit for print, I am officially a Buddhist. Don’t laugh. You can still be a complete A-Type personality and find your Buddha nature. Yes. You can. This is Los Angeles, not a Kyoto temple. We do the best we can.

I can’t say that I was Shakubuku’d proper (I have been studying and practicing Buddhism off and on for years), but, as they say: When the student is ready, she will share deep-fried cheesecake at Katana with someone who chants near her house. While I love Tibetan Buddhist philosophy and the Dalai Lama’s smile, quieting my mind and silent meditation just ain’t my thing. I needed to chant. So, I suppose the person who really gave me the Shakubuku was Angela Bassett/Tina Turner in “What’s Love Got To Do With It”. That was my introduction to Nam Myoho Renge Kyo. Wasn’t it yours? Anyhow, on January 8th (David Bowie’s birthday and the 6th anniversary of RUAWAKE), I did my first toso. At the end of February, I gave my first “experience”...and Courtney Love was there. Holla! And, last week, I received my Gohonzon. Now, I’m just Buddhaful.

In Los Angeles, each and every day is an adventure. You never know what you might see or who you might do...or vice versa.