06 August 2008

Me No Likey

I watch my fair share of crime related television. I grew up on Alfred Hitchcock Presents, McMillan and Wife, and Quincy. I'm not sure a three year old should have been watching murder mysteries on her own, but I was riveted. I watched nearly the whole of the Menendez trials, became an addict of CourTV, and watch all the A&E justice stuff. There's a bit of Sherlock Holmes in me. I like to figure things out. I like to figure people out even more.

I've always been struck by the victims' families, those who could go on to speak of their loved ones and say things like: "Everybody loved her. She was so nice. She never had a harsh word to say about anyone. She didn't have an enemy in the world." The entire towns of those victims would mourn. It always seemed it's the best of us that are taken. And that is truly sad.

However, it makes me feel rather safe.

See, I don't like everybody, so I never expected everybody to like me. I'm an acquired taste with a picky personality. No one will ever say, "Everybody loved Sandra." And I'm okay with that.

I'm not nice. I don't like that word. It's right up there with "lady". They are restrictive and milquetoast and make my skin crawl. They meant I had to sit still, keep my dress clean, and not run out and play. Therefore, I refuse to be nice. That's not to say that I'm mean. I am fun, polite, professional, easy-going (at times), understanding (occasionally), but I also have a temper and an extreme sense of right and wrong, and will make my feelings very clear when necessary.

Being a writer, I have a lot of words in me. Some of them are harsh. Some I save for paper, but many are said aloud. If you've ever cut me off, you've heard a few of them.

As far as enemies go, I've made more than one. I actually considered it a point of character. Very old school: You've wronged me, sir/madam, and now you must pay! Granted, I've mellowed a great deal over time. I can't really name an active acrimony, but get me to a Republican bar in Orange County and I'll whip some up.

I never wanted to be Princess Popular. If everybody loved me, how would I ever test my boundaries? I think it's okay not to like everyone or every thing. We all have our preferences, our turn-ons and turn-offs. They should be known. That certainly doesn't mean it's fine to hate what you don't like. That's simply nonsensical. But I'm fine with saying, "Me no likey," about someone or something. Especially if it's the truth.

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